What is emotional intelligence and how to develop it

Emotional intelligence

Emotions are pieces of information as important as a gale warning or fire alarm. They allow us to stay connected to the outer world and to ourselves. Feeling, interpreting, and managing our emotions is so crucial that some employers have already started measuring the EQ of their future employees in line with their IQ. Anyway, it is not only the workplace that requires us to be emotionally aware. The ability to stay friends with our feelings gives us a powerful boost to our quality of life.

The definition of emotional intelligence or EQ

Emotional intelligence (or emotional quotient) is a person’s ability to feel and manage emotions to get better spiritually, physically, or socially. Most people are capable of experiencing a broad range of emotions, from anger to excitement. But few of us can make their feelings useful.

Emotionally intelligent people can wonderfully manage stress, resolve conflicts, and support others when necessary. They can preserve great physical and mental health even when the pressure is hard.

Unfortunately, most of us do completely opposite things when overwhelmed by feelings. In this article, we will give you a few tips on how to make your emotions work for you and not against you.

Step 1: Recognize and understand your emotions

While emotional intelligence includes many things, like empathy, motivation, and socialization, the understanding of what you feel lies in its core. Weird as it may seem, we often do not recognize emotions that make things complicated. Feeling angry, desperate, and almost hysterical, people cannot single out what’s depressing them so much.

Before you learn how to manage stress, you have to understand what is happening inside you. Try to be honest with yourself every time you feel a powerful emotion. Tell yourself, “I feel anxious because … (my colleague looked strange at me this morning).” Do not try to solve your problem right away. Just face emotions that put you out of balance.

Step 2: Manage what you feel

Once you can recognize your own emotions, you can manifest and regulate them appropriately. Try to express your feelings instead of suppressing them. Communicate with people who cause you emotional troubles. If there is no way to adequately influence the source of your stress, talk it through with a therapist. Communicating with another person is a great way to take a fresh look at your problem.

As you try to manage your emotions, you can also practice being kind to yourself. Our stress management often fails because we set a tight framework and do not forgive ourselves of failure. Instead, practice gratitude when you can.

Step 3: Anticipate what other people feel

High emotional intelligence makes it more comfortable to coexist with your emotions. But it is also a great support for your social life. Emotional intelligence gives you empathy. You can understand what other people feel, what they need, and what motivates them. We often think that other people are a lot like ourselves. In fact, other people may have different motives, and we have to understand what they need to build effective communication. To achieve that, try to shift your concentration from yourself to other people. Just listen and observe what others say or do. Be ready that your social environment may be different from you.

Using emotional intelligence to get the best out of your social interaction

Your ability to understand and manage emotions is the key to living a balanced and fulfilling life. Emotional intelligence helps us to remain kind to ourselves and to other people. It is the way to arrange our social interaction productively and to understand ourselves better. Many people have an enormous emotional potential. They often find their feelings overwhelming and envy their cold-minded friends. But our emotions are not a curse. They are an asset that can help us live more happy and balanced lives.

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