Absurd recommendations: how to get expelled from your high school, college, or university

Student in the library

[DISCLAIMER] Before you start reading this, mind these are not recommendations you should follow. These are just stupid pieces of advice we’ve compiled to make you smile. That’s why you should not repeat them in real life if you don’t want to get expelled from your educational institution. 

Be always late to your classes or miss them

Who has told that you should be in your class on time? Relax, put the alarm off, and enjoy your morning sleep for 2-3 hours more. You can also go have a cup of coffee or a regular breakfast in your favorite cafe. As an option, you can play Mortal Kombat or read a book. Finally, you can sleep till the last moment and then have a walk instead of riding on the bus.

Play games on your smartphone and don’t listen to your teacher

video games

Photo by Maliha Mannan on Unsplash

What is your favorite video game? Perhaps, it’s Sims? Or Minecraft? Or, maybe, Bubble Shooter? Whatever it is, take your time and pay full attention to playing it during class. Chatting with friends on Facebook, Instagram, or elsewhere will also do. At least, it’s much more enjoyable than listening to the boring stuff your teacher tries to put into your head. You won’t need all that information in your life.

If a teacher notices you are staring at your smartphone and asks you to put it aside, you can try playing paper-and-pencil games, like tic-tac-toe with your fellow students.

Make some noise

You can scratch the table with your keys, whistle your favorite song, turn on a music player on your mobile phone, watch an episode from your favorite sitcom, or even snore if you haven’t had enough sleep. The louder the noise you make, the better. 

You can also encourage your classmates to join you and you can sing as a huge choir. Optionally, you can prepare a performance, based on tales or books. This will help you develop your artistic talent, along with public speaking skills.

Put off all your assignments until tomorrow

Why should you do your homework when there’s such beautiful weather outside? Or when your friends invite you to the cafe, bar, or concert? Enjoy your life in full swing, and your tasks will wait until the next day, which is the deadline, actually. Never overload yourself with studies, not to mention doing anything in advance. What can wait, should wait, right?

Turn in free papers from essay banks

students with a laptop

Photo by John Schnobrich on Unsplash

Really, who cares about doing research or presenting original ideas on a topic? It’s so much easier to download a free paper matching your discipline and submit it to your teacher no matter what. By the way, more downloads mean this paper is extremely good, which increases the chance of getting a higher grade for it.

Don’t overcomplicate your life—get a ready-made assignment and enjoy your free time. Plagiarism? Come on, who will scan your paper for plagiarism?

Never get prepared for your exams

Well, it’s our favorite part. Of course, you are a genius, like Albert Einstein or Alan Turing was. Definitely, everything you touch becomes gold. Even wrong answers to your tests autocorrect. Wait, have we said “wrong?” Apologies, nothing can go wrong with such an outstanding person like you. You will always get the highest grades for your exams, even if you haven’t studied a single page. Just prepare to use all your charm and that’ll do!

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Published by
Lauren Bradshaw
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Lauren started writing in 2003. Since then, she tried her hand in SEO and website copywriting, composing for blogs, and working as an academic writer. Her main interests lie in content marketing, developing communication skills, and blogging.